Strange Changes...

Life is like the I pod, no matter how u plan ur playlist u might not be able to avoid the track cummin up next.

A boy meets a girl, and the girl in turn meets a boy, attraction, like, affection, care words follow but the sad part is bored, fore granted, sorry, shout .... as i said, words follow...
All of us know the only thing that brings  & keeps two persons together is love and affection, they may turn it up in to a relationship, which is supposed to be the fruit.
Wooho.. plz dont go, this is not another thesis on relationships... i knw this is not going in with the images...  but it will intern .. :P

The thread that ties us, after all we try and impress and do really put allot of emotional investment for this thread to exist and by the logic it should be the most important thing to protect and cared for, but suddenly for simplest of the reasons or may be mistakes by one counterpart the other starts putting the same thread as the bait, a thing to scare the other from being broken apart, and then, i cant bare you, enough, you are impossible, how can you, i didn't expect this, i did expect that and its over.... and now even words refuse to follow..

They say, this love will change you, well does any thing stays the same ?

nop, just same strange changes, and even if it does isn't that what love supposed to do ?

 We all grow old, aging is quit a process. At nine dream of twelve and then the teenage, being young, thirties  and forty five and then we want to go back.. well, i thought growing up was the whole point.
Same eve of scintillation 2013 came with more of a shock.......



One of very good friends and a mentor is getting divorced and to be frank i am sad, cause i could relate to him, and now i can relate more..
and that is why these picks don't go with my words..
i came to know in the later part of the eve.

Well any ways we had our "Annual day" defiantly-maybe ( :P ) at lnt infotech and was cool.. fun and lots of dancing, particularly as turn up the music cause the sun just came up,and if they try to turn us down..

will leave you with few clicks ...
Though Amal had this strain , he is our personal rajni anna.. nothing less than " the world is about to end" could stop him from dancing..

we change, some for good some out of no explainable reasons. Now excepting and rejecting depend on you or may be the right now wala state of you..

"coz the set of values you variables contain at that particular instant of time defines you, at the moment level..

people call it a moment, i call it life...

learning life..."

the host was RJ Malishka, red FM wali.. ;)
awsome bajatey raho of all the seniors with Sunny Leon, and widely appreciated duo meant jokes.

and now the last one, this is Ashish & Gautam,
we enjoyed allot, danced, screamed- i mean northern, Punjabi, the vulgar ones and the most decent steps... the call was " Disko me jab ye gana bajega, step kark dikhana parega ;)" We danced our way out of the place with everyone, changes might be strange but sometimes they r for good.. now plz dont ask who's and why ..

and about the prior, ill say if you ever care for something please do not put it on bait, do not let the love go.. cause it leaves behind sorrow, grief and vacant space..

and like i said, just words follow..

good monin and good night

regards, hopeless, j..

That was then, this is now..

Truth, is a very tricky thing.., well, it has tricked me quit a few times now..

Importance,  priority, happyness, trust.., words with really heavy meanings..
after all these r the words, which decides the orientation of the flip..
the words we use.

They say dont lie, it hearts when the truth comes in the light, I say ooh cumon, please turn the lights off, because if it is harse. The truth kills u every day.. " a bit of heart attack, a bit of blood pressure,  a bit of dissatisfaction,  disappointment evry day... sounds creepy ?

Yes it does to me. At least a lie for gud.. givs u one little hope to think one way..
To chose for the end or refresh.....
 

They say work on time, else the sword hangs right above the neck, and the sharp edge is about to let everything white be bygones.. the work becomes tuff, I say when I get going, tuff gets going..

Have u experienced that last drop of the chocolate shake.. the golden drop of bear, last scoop of the Nutella,  that winning shot on the last ball and that loosing wicket too one may be tha same, last spoon of Maggie, last breath of the kiss, the last memory.. well, the word is "marginal utility".

They say, stand alone..
I don't say a thing, cause I walk the streets alone, I here be in on my own.. and I knw how it feels being a thousand miles away from home, from all of them whose presence makes difference.
I knw how it feel to be with the one you love..  ha ha and then when she slams the door..
But m ova hea, all alone, n m doing juuust fine..

 

this was not me since ever, a movie or a TV series or a game could consume me for months. Though I am a loner for sum time now, ....
since like...... always,
but this is different, I decided to teach orphan kids on Saturdays which intern made me busy and satisfied because I could help and sad because INDIAN government still just spends 900 Indian rupees for one child.... wait the point is "in an year".

 

this weekend couldn't teach so I decided ill work.. m going office on Sunday's..

I could give any thing for an extra Sunday, now I will do any thing to through it away.

 

They say that was then...

and I say this is Now.

regards

hopeless, j



Locked from inside...

Dear reader,

i was just sitting at the cafe the other evening, and some one comes on the front a look and eyes drove away...
the thought that consumes me, is we do check out people. Everyone around, the narial pani wala, the stressed out  shopkeeper who couldn't make a sale yet, aunty carrying the vegetables, men, women, workers kids, beggars ...

Did u look at the expressions, i tried.. like i could read out their faces.. not like lines, but like thoughts. If not the precise data, moreover the nature of the thought.
What if i could say hey, whats up.. and what is going on , hows life buddy.
but its like everyone has shut their doors locked it up and buried the key .. as if the "line Break the ice" , should be like "break the door", the ice was colder.. now the door is hard, wood-ish, and a bad conductor of warmth and spark.

I asked Amal, is this idea too awkward of knowing everyone, if we could say hellos to everyone, communicate and share.. i mean not on Fb.
he says it isn't a very strange notion as it actually happens when you are in your neighborhood, you grow up their, you know everyone, can talk and say hi..

after traveling all the places and keep on leaving people behind, loved ones way apart somewhere in the other corner of the country or the loved ones stay near by, the love goes way apart in the  other corner of nowhere and i forgot what "neighborhood" means! and how it feels like knowing.. and not-if knowing
feel the absence..

well any ways ABSENCE has been a real word for me these days, again.


regards.. jey

Dear reader,
i was just sitting at the cafe the other evening, and some one comes on the front a look and eyes drove away...the thought that consumes me, is we do check out people. Everyone around, the narial pani wala, the stressed out  shopkeeper who couldn't make a sale yet, aunty carrying the vegetables, men, women, workers kids, beggars ...
Did u look at the expressions, i tried.. like i could read out their faces.. not like lines, but like thoughts. If not the precise data, moreover the nature of the thought.What if i could say hey, whats up.. and what is going on , hows life buddy.but its like everyone has shut their doors locked it up and buried the key .. as if the "line Break the ice" , should be like "break the door", the ice was colder.. now the door is hard, wood-ish, and a bad conductor of warmth and spark.
I asked Amal, is this idea too awkward of knowing everyone, if we could say hellos to everyone, communicate and share.. i mean not on Fb.he says it isn't a very strange notion as it actually happens when you are in your neighborhood, you grow up their, you know everyone, can talk and say hi..
after traveling all the places and keep on leaving people behind, loved ones way apart somewhere in the other corner of the country or the loved ones stay near by, the love goes way apart in the  other corner of nowhere and i forgot what "neighborhood" means! and how it feels like knowing.. and not-if knowingfeel the absence..
well any ways ABSENCE has been a real word for me these days, again.

regards.. jey

A Poison Tree

I was angry with my friend, I told my wrath, my wrath did end.

I was angry with my foe, I told it not, my wrath did grow.

And I watered it in fears, Night and morning with my tears 

And I sunned it with smiles, And with soft deceitful wiles.

And it grew both day and night,Till it bore an apple bright.

And my foe beheld it shine. And he knew that it was mine,

And into my garden stole..

When the night had veiled the pole, 

In the morning glad I see

My foe outstretched beneath the tree.

Honorable courage...

THERE IS NOT TO MAKE REPLCOURAGEON WHY, THERE IS TO DO AND DIE. 

COURAGE IS A HARD THING TO FIGURE,
YOU CAN HAVE COURAGE BASED ON A DUMB IDEA OR MISTAKE.

BUT YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO QUESTION THE DON'TS, OR YOU’RE COACH OR YOUR TEACHER,.. BEACUSE THEY MAKE THE RULES, MAYBE THEY KNOW THE BEST OR MAY BE THEY DONT. 

THAT ALL DEPENDS ON WHO YOU ARE, WHERE U COME FROM...

DIDNT AT LEST ONE OF THE SIX HUNDRED GUYS THOUGHT OF GIVING UP AND JOINING WITH THE OTHER SIDE. I MEAN VALLY OF DEATH, THAT IS PREETY SALTY STUFF, AND WHY GO FAR AWAY, MAHABHARATA.. ONE OUR WOM EPICS WAS A MASACURE.. AND NONE OF MILLIONS FIGHTING EVER, TOOK A FOOT BEHIND..
COURAGE IS REALLY TRICKY,..

SHOULD YOU ALWAY

DO WHAT YOU ARE TOLD TO DO?

SOMETIMES YOU MIGHT NOT EVEN KNOW WHY YOU’RE DOING SOMETHING, I MEAN ANY FOOL CAN HAVE COURAGE...
BUT HONOR, THAT’S THE REAL REASON YOU ITHER DO SOME THING OR YOU DONT  IT’S WHO YOU ARE AND MAY BE WHO YOU WANT TO BE, IF YOU DIE TRYING TO DO SOMETHING IMPORTANT THEN YOU HAV BOTH HONOR AND COURAGE, AND THAT IS PREETY GOOD. 

I THINK THAT IS WHAT I WAS TRYING TO SAY , WE SHOULD HOPE FOR COURAGE AND TRY FOR HONOR AND MAY BE EVEN PRY FOR THE  PEOPLE TELLING YOU WHAT TO DO,
THEY SHOULD, HAVE SOME TOO..

I HAVE HAD, THE FOOLISH COURAGE MOSTLY AND HONER SOME TIMES TOO, AND TRUST ME LOVE, IT IS NOT THE BEST FEELING..

WELL IN ANY CASE, IF YOU CHOSE TO FEEL..

REGARDS

HOPELESS, JEY

The Cup and the turtle..

Princess 10:21 : put ur cup in the drawer, n lock it no one will take it

grow up..

Jack 10:22 : hmnnh..

i know no one will take it ..but :(

Princess 10:23  :  then??

Jack 10:23  :  ohk

Princess 10:23  :  what?? tell me

Jack 10:24  :  its just that its new and green

Princess 10:25  :  and???

Jack 10:25  :  emm..and its a cup :P

Princess 10:25  :  so???????????

Jack 10:25  :  how a cup stay with a tortoise ???

Princess 10:26  :  keep the cup in drawer and tortotise on desk and tell ur tortotise not to eat ur cup

Jack 10:27  :  :P ur talking childish, how will the tortoise eat the cup ??

the cup is bigger ?

Princess 10:28  :  like a child eat mutton

Jack 10:29  :  now how does that connect 

because the child is smaller than the goate ??

gote *

Princess 10:38  :  no goat is bigger than child

Jack 10:40  :  hmnn..

Princess 10:40  :  crawling child

Jack 10:41  :  they just drink the milk ..

Princess 10:42  :  no

Jack 10:42  :  not eat the compleate goat

Princess 10:42  :  yeah not the complete, but some part of it

Jack 10:43  :  they dont even have teeth

may be one or two..in the front, like a rabbit

Princess 10:43  :  so they can just swallow it :P

Jack 10:44  :  ewwwuuu.. swallow a goat

Princess 10:44  :  no..only leg piece or so

Jack 10:45  :  a goat's leg ???

Princess 10:45  :  yes

Jack 10:46  :  isnt that pritty much bigger ??

Princess 10:52  : preety*

yeah it is but when its dead and cut into pieces, child can have it

Jack 10:53  : but my cup is not dead :'(

Princess 10:55  : then??

why cannt u keep it with ur toy turtle? :@

Jack 10:56  : my turtle is not a toy :$

Princess 10:56  : ahhhh ohkay

then tell me y cant u keep ur cup with ur turtle??

Jack 10:57  : i can *-)

Princess 10:57  : then????

Jack 10:58  : then nothin

g... u only said the cup will eat my turtle :(

no one should eat my turtle

never

not acceptable !!

Princess 10:59  : i said ur cup will NOT eat ur turtle

Jack 11:00  : but u said the turtle will eat the cup :(

like the child eats the goat :$

my poor little green cupno one sud eat my cup:(

not even the leg peace of my cup….   

inspired by a true chat.. of two fully adult software engineers..

if u believe in it.. 

regards.. hopeless, jey

You and I..

Bengaluru - Chennai - Mumbai....

Hola a todos mis queridos visitantes.
Ya hace mucho tiempo este momento, creo que la última vez que escribí, estaba en Karnataka (Bangalore)....

aah it is not that I have learnt Spanish .. just came to mind to add some .. aSh in the PAIN..

well  in not so long time I have travelled three biggest states of my country, stayed there lived like and with them, learned, loved.. suffered and moved.. so thought this would be the best way to bridge the gap.. tell u the short story...

so that I could have the benefit of going into flash back again.. and again ;)

I have met good people, no, grate and beautiful people. Awesome places, work processes and tasted some really unbelievable food in both the senses :P..

now working, LNT InfoTech, Mumbai and still.. its a lot more to learn n explore

"a broken heart was rebuilt, re-broken and still it beats and bleeds
a hopeless mind, still watches its way and craves for wisdom.." credits- me :P

See what am I writing, I seriously don't wanna turn into some one who thinks he is philosopher.
while working on the worlds most widely used ERP software, all I need is to be me..

and these are few of my fav images from this small journey.. and the present pause !!!

the Orion and the amazon the duo in bang, waooo.. the place I would like to go back again..

Chennai, Murgan temple  and my office.. isn't it..

emmm... officious :P

I really thought it was creative to put those scrolls at the staircase and few days at Mahape

(Navi Mumbai) 

 

The thunder, powai lake and ..

 

hopeless, jey..
will keep in touch now..
 

Learned enough of life... need some rest !

Dejavo

After spending six unexpected, anticipated months of the life in banglore, I have been living the most anticipated night life, whic other banglorians dont get the privledge to live.. because of my many nights at call center now staying awak at night is a burden fo me now.

We after all leaving tjos place with the , ixed feeling of happyness, and gratitude ..

Few of the Craziest proposals ever ..

We all look forward to finding that one single person who completes us, and makes us feel alive and special. When we do find that significant other or better half, we make grand gestures of love to them and we put in motion an attempt to seal the deal with a marriage proposal. Well, i was hopeless, but these people..

These are some of the most romantic proposals that i've found to help you when it's time or just to give you a moment to go 'awww'...

Isaac's Live Lip-Dub Proposal

When Isaac decided he wanted to marry Amy, he did it in the most theatrical way possible and to the tune of Bruno Mars' 'Marry You'. He got all his friends and family together to lip sync and dramatize the song on the road near his parents' house while his girlfriend sat in the back of the car watching and listening to the song on headphones.

Tim's Meme Proposal:

Timothy Tiah Ewe Tiam who shared a love of the internets with his girlfriend Audrey Ooi Feng Ling proposed to her with a slideshow of memes. He surprised her at a coffee shop while she was with her friends and began his print slideshow of internet memes leading upto a proposal. Now that's what we call, 'like a boss'

Jim's Illustration Proposal

Jim's proposal to Julie completely tugs at your heart strings. He created a website with beautifully drawn illustrations of their lives together which concluded with him reaching the pinnacle of his happiness meter at their wedding. There is also a video of her reaction to reading the website. For the whole, proposal go to 

http://juliewillyoumarry.me/

Matt's Movie Theater Proposal...

Our second theatrical performance was literally aired at a theater. Matt lured his girlfriend, Ginny, to the local theater where she saw a movie trailer of Matt asking her dad permission to marry her and then running to the theater to present the ring. Filmmaker Michael Escobar was hired to do the trailer.

Stay inspired..

please post me if you have done something equally nuts.. 

then i will tell you one more...

with a not so happy ending

--

hopeless, jey

3 longest minutes….

Since my child hood, mum was love and papa was fear, more over synonyms … well time changes things, but how much?

Bihar, in 2001 census, Muzaffarpur had a population of 3,746,714 of which males were 1,951,466 and remaining 1,795,248 were females. 

Average literacy rate stood at 59.10 and 35.81 in Muzaffarpur District. Total literate in Muzaffarpur District were 2,601,665 of which male and female were 1,539,154 and 1,062,511 respectively. In 2001, Muzaffarpur District had 1,440,954 in its district. Out of which 36% ware the kids below 6 years. Imagine the condition in 1988 when finally a phenomenon landed on earth … I, me and myself !!

My parents came up with an idea that I should not be allowed to play with the slum-dog millionaires in the neighbors, and I grew up with 72 TV channels with animals on discovery and cartoons on the network. Lost in my own world and having fights with me, I developed a personality which was not uniquely identifiable.  

I used to be every character I liked, from Dexter to captain planet in 90’s till to Damon Salvatore to Joseph Morgan of today.

Papa was strong, determined, and confident and on the contrary the junior was suppressed, confused and variable having more of a kind of multiple personality disorder.

Five days of high temperature and pain, I was suffering from a viral infection, medicines could control the temperature for hours only and once their effect was off, I used to be hot again.

In noon I took the medicine, for the heat as it was bumping up, and it was prescribed to be taken once only, one hour later, mummy found that the fever was still bumping and was around 104 and counting, she unknowingly gave me one more of those heat tablets, and just ten minutes later papa came home and guess what, he gave me one more …

Me unconscious and dosed by three times the paracetamol I could bare started losing my temperature after burning at 105 from inside out, I could open my eyes and saw my family surrounding me, closed my eyes and in might me a second for me tried opening them again, the evening had turned in to night…

Family and family friends and the nabours all around me!!

Hell, what happened?

I figured out that since evening, my temperature started dropping and never stopped, I was 20 degrees below normal, my one had was in my mums and other in the doctors hand, he could not locate the pulse..

And the nabours already started with the chances of the death of a boy they almost never saw playing cricket or running for a kite which just detached from its thread or throwing a stone at the street dogs searching for a bit of shadow, well I was cold now, every second was noisy as I could hear the clock and barely see any faces, papa was sitting at near my head, I left mums and grabbed paa’s, and said I cannot hold it tight papa, I am shaky, uncle in the corner was trying to get the ambulance, mum was crying and my little sister was trying to keep me dry and warm.. But this time I was freezing from inside...

Time seemed stopped and I felt I am weightless, just one strong feel of having my father with me holding my hands as strong as the fear I had for him... in the mean while Mr. doctor figured out that I was overdosed and it reacted, so an antidote could work and I was stabbed an injection to stop the reaction as soon as possible, holding my fathers hands watching mum, my sister and a not so loved doctor.. The temperature finally stopped with the ambulance at my door steps...

The viral fever never came back but, I was up and running in five more days. Those three minutes went off but they left me with feelings I will never forget...

After more than ten years of those frozen three minutes, relations and the value of life changed, Mr. senior Singh is more like a friend than a father now, but the junior singh is still a hopeless.

If you want to feel an experience of love and proud to be your father's son, please try, "I Am MY Father's Son" by Dan Hill. I hope you will like it.

Thanks for reading

Regards, jey

When I'm gone..

Have you ever loved someone so much, you'd give an arm for?
Not the expression, no, literally give an arm for?
When they know they're your heart
And you know you were their armour
And you will destroy anyone who would try to harm 'her
But what happens when karma, turns right around and bites you?
And everything you stand for, turns on you to spite you?
What happens when you become the main source of her pain?

 

When I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice
Just know that I'm looking for your smile
And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel my pain
Just smile back...

Welcome to IMS, you are with jey...

 

Have you ever asked yourself this question “Why does this guy earn this much in an IMS, while I work my ass off in the office and still don’t get half as much as he does?” Well, think again!

Many often think that being a IMS agent is a breeze, walk in, talk for a couple of hours, have a couple of cigarettes, go drink with friends after shift and go home, and get a huge paycheck on payday. This is the common thinking amongst those earn work for a living, compared to those who earn to maintain their lifestyle.

Little do people know that there are a lot of sacrifices needed to gain so much. Sleep, family time, and sometimes relationships. The most common is sleep, since most IMSs operate during the night to match the time in the country of which their clients do business. It is scientifically proven that sleep is best taken during the night since this is the normal behavior of the human body.

The second is not being able to spend as much time for the family for those who have children or are taking care of other family members. And third is sacrificing one’s relationship to focus on earning more and being able to have a fruitful career in the industry.

These may look like simple sacrifices but if you look at it closer and try putting yourself in their shoes, you would realize what these people are losing to gain or maintain the current lifestyle in which most IMS agents live. It is now very common to meet someone at an exclusive bar or club and ask where they work or what they do and they would generally say in a IMS. The industry not only provides opportunities for people to sustain a living for their families, but also open up new horizons for some.

I have asked around and came across several individuals who work in the industry and asked them what difference did they had from when they worked in a conventional office job and the benefits they have received from working in a IMS. One technical support agent said “I have worked in an IT company before, where I worked the same number of hours, I definitely worked my ass off and even got to the point that I almost drove myself crazy from the load that I had, I didn’t have time to go out even during Saturday nights, since I would devote myself to sleep and rest the whole weekend.

Now, I work the number of hours, but I definite don’t have as much burden on my shoulders and I call it as Infra structure management services. The only downside is that when I get home I feel alone on earth, when I wake up to go to work my world is already asleep. The only time I get to spend time with them is during the week off which again is never on the same days every time.”

Talking with few of the finest, funniest, different cultures, age groups, very intelligent and sometimes very angry voices from United States, united Kingdome, Russia, China, France, Australia and all around the world..

Every time a new trouble, a virus,

or corrupted windows account,

a router not working or a network not found!!

thank you for visiting, learning life

have a gud day, and you were with jey..   

Amen omen...

What started as a whisper, slowly turned into a scream
Searching for an answer, where the question is unseen
I don't know where you came from, and I don't know where you've gone
Old friends become old strangers between darkness and the dawn

Amen omen, will I see your face again?
Amen omen, can I find the place within to live my life without you?

I still hear you saying, "All of life is chance"
And is sweetest, is sweetest when at a glance
But I live, I live a hundred, hundred life times in a day
But I die a little in every breath that I take

Amen omen, will I see your face again?
Amen omen, can I find the place within to live my life without you?

I listen to a whisper slowly drift away
Silence is a loudest parting word you never say
I put, I put your world into my reins
And now a voiceless sympathy is all that remains

Amen omen, will I see your face again?
Amen omen, can I find the place within to live my life without you?

Forever isn't long enough

There are moments in my life that I'll always remember, not because they were important, but because you were there in them. Because of you... I laugh a little harder, cry a little less, and smile a little more. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

When you thought I was not trusting, you were so wrong, baby, I was loving you.

 

Its weird how sometimes things just have to happen to see how you actually feel about someone.
We only think that you are immune to feelings. And the most unlikely person could reduce you to tears, laughter, or spontaneous declarations of love.

Today someone asked me, "Do you think it's possible to love a person forever?"
I didn't know what to say, but then I thought of you, I knew it was true.
and my hopeless answer,

"Forever isn't long enough.".

Happy New Year..

2013.. my new year, and i was working.. 
well work was my priority.. or say i could not help, it was forced !!

We all, in our own ways give or expect priorities .. to goals, to feelings, to achievements, to relations, to people to our selves.

one of the biggest of all the expectations, you will face or will put in for ur loved once..
i suggest, do not put them in trouble..
checklist..! can i be the the number one on your's..

Stay Safe, Stay Healthy, wish you
A very happy new year
Hopeless jey ;)